An update for my fans, uh, I mean fan ; )

I haven't really posted anything of substance since near the end of November.  I guess I just haven't had much I've felt like chatting about lately.  What I have posted has been very random, quotes & pictures found online, but much of my blog is random so this isn't too unusual I suppose.

I guess this might be a serious post...

Much of October/November/December (can't say for sure) I wasn't really myself.  I was exhausted all the time, taking naps on the weekend (and I never do that!), was much less social, generally just not me.  I even went to the doctor because I also felt like my glands were swollen and what with the unusual napping and all.  I had some blood tests run and I guess they were normal since I didn't hear back from the doctor.  Anyways, I decided to just take it easy, rest and concentrate on eating properly/sleeping well.  If it didn't seem to be helping then I'd head back to the doctor.

I can safely say I'm feeling much better now.  I'm working on taking my vitamins every day.  I'm trying to cut out junk foods/drinks.  I'm sleeping better now too.  

However, looking back it's possible I was slightly depressed.  Having lost both my grandfather and great aunt in the span of a month just before Fall was quite a lot to handle.  I think I did the best I could, but being so far from the family certainly didn't help.  (It's times like these that make me wish I was still living in Ontario).  I think I was also a little guilty since the last time I'd seen my grandfather was around 10 years ago.  I thought I'd have lots of time to see him.  Now I know.

I guess it really hit me when I had my performance review at work a couple months back.  My boss commented that I was a lot happier then I'd been in a while.  I guess I didn't really realize that I'd been so sad, especially at work.  Maybe sometimes you just don't realize how hard things can hit you.

So now 6 months or so have passed...

The guilt is lessoning.  I'm feeling happier.  I still have those moments of sadness where it hits me that I'll never see him again.  But it's getting better.  I'm going to see my grandma in June.  I'm a bit nervous about how it'll be.  How I'll be, I guess.  I'm sure it'll be sad for a bit, I just don't want to make grandma feel bad.  I will get to see my cousins though.  They were very small the last time I saw them so it'll be nice to see them so grown up (ok, they're like 11 & 13 or something).  But still it's a nice happy part to look forward to.

Anyways, that's all I have to report.  I'll try to post more in the future and especially on happier topics.

P.S. - Sorry for the depressing post.